As the overwhelming rush of Valentine’s Day comes to an end, a wide range of feelings may arise depending on how you spent your holiday. The psychological responses can have positive or negative effects on one’s mental health. It is crucial to protect your mental health and find ways to alleviate your stress during this time. Caring for your mental health begins with the ability to recognize that Valentine’s Day might not be your favorite day of the year.
Whether you’re in a relationship or not, societal pressures and what is expected of you and your peers create a new norm, specifically on social media. Think about it this way: every social media post you see on Valentine’s Day is through a lens showcasing either a new relationship or a lasting relationship. For the most part, you don’t see people highlighting their love for themselves.
The online world is very different from the real world. Online, you are aware of what is going on with all the people you know. This overwhelming and fake world may cause some to spiral into feelings of exclusion from something that everyone seems to have. It is important to remember that social media only showcases the highlights of someone’s life, and making comparisons based on their posts is unrealistic.
Something you may come across on the internet is the sharing of gifts. Receiving flowers and chocolates from your loved ones is a common way of expressing love. With that, some may feel an obligation to share gifts with others. If everyone is just trying to reach that same bar, are the gifts just for a superficial theme? I believe a gift can’t equate to a feeling of love. A small token of gratitude that captures a good memory will go far farther than a store-bought gift.
Companies are constantly working towards designing something that checks all the boxes of a Valentine’s Day gift. If you find yourself shopping for a Valentine’s gift, I can predict that you’re looking for something original with an innovative design. If you want my advice, scrap the store-bought items and create something meaningful. Large corporations cannot capture a specific feeling into an item. If you’re feeling lost on gift ideas, try finding something that resembles more than a “thing.” Use a memory as inspiration for gift giving. For example, my favorite gift I have seen given to someone is a classic memory scrapbook. Just knowing that someone spent the time printing and putting together pictures means so much more than chocolates.
SELF-LOVE
Not all feelings of disappointment come from the lack of a relationship. Setting expectations to have a great Valentine’s Day means you are seeking happiness outside of your control. Whether you feel dependent on someone you’re dating or if it’s from a relationship with friends, I encourage you to find the love within yourself and to take the pressure off of the things around you and on social media.
For the people who are not in a relationship, don’t fret over the need to feel loved by someone else. Remember that the most important relationship is the relationship you have with yourself, family and friends. Valentine’s Day was not a measure of your worthiness. Instead, the day was there for you to value the meaningful and genuine connections you have.
While indulging in social media love stories is entertaining, it is important to consider unfocusing for a minute on all the desires and not compare yourself to others. Falling into a rabbit hole is just another way to forget that your free time should be prioritized doing activities you enjoy. The lack of doing things solely for yourself can make or break the love you have for yourself. Some activities that will help encourage self-love include watching your favorite show, treating yourself to your favorite food, getting a massage, or organizing and cleaning your room.
Additionally, creating realistic expectations for yourself is a great way to begin your self-love journey. If Valentine’s Day didn’t go as you expected it to, being able to let go of what happened will help your growth towards self-love. Instead of fixating on something, decide what you can do for the future. Talk to yourself positively and give yourself grace.
If you are feeling down after the holiday, don’t hesitate to reach out to a trusted person. Remember that Valentine’s Day is a great way to celebrate the love in your life! Love isn’t just from dating, love is the relationships with your friends, family and yourself. Social media may have painted the holiday in an unrealistic way, but you shouldn’t let it affect your emotional well-being and the relationship you have with yourself.
